The Blogging of Kaya 589

My coaching partner and I run a year long transformational membership group that helps our clients to shake up their relationship and dating life. Our goal isn't just to help men get a date. It's to help men totally master relationships in life (romantic relationships being our starting point), and to make those relationships healthy and long lasting. We have a collective 30 years of experience in dating and relationship work, we have given workshops, helped clients to work on their lives and have developed our own relationship coaching model that we now use to coach our clients. What I’m repeatedly told from new clients is that they are feeling lost, confused and often overwhelmed with information and advice they’re getting online. When dating, we see that they are playing power games, having communication issues, and struggling to express their feelings in an effective way. The women they talk to and meet on dates often reject or ghost them, and don't tell them why. Lack of non-judgmental and direct feedback from women is something that I believe is holding men back from better success on their dates (or even getting dates). So. I will give you that feedback in this AMA over the next 12-24 hours.

Remember, there's thousands of new people that sign up daily. Set Boundaries. Only you know what attracts you to another person. Only you know what's important to you. Examine those things, and when you're looking for a potential match, don't settle for someone that you're not compatible with. In the same line of thought, don't set too many boundaries; keep those lines to the important things. By setting too many boundaries, you may pass by someone who you could build a lasting relationship with. It's a simple fact; the person you meet online is going to be different than the person you meet in person. Online dating is just a tool, it is a way to help you connect with other people. While they may provide you with a lot of information, you still miss out on important parts of their lives until you actually meet them. Only a small portion of their personality can be seen through the internet.

Especially about important things like marital status, sexual orientation, weight/appearance, children, disabilities, etc. This is the most basic fundamental rule for dating online. One day, you're going to meet someone that you're interested in. They are going to find out who you truly are. If you really expect to find love online, don't shoot it down before it even begins. Simply put: honesty is the best policy. If you're going to date online, make a commitment that you're going to give it your all. Do not write, "I'm not good with talking about myself." Do not write, "I'm looking for a good girl/guy." Give people something to read; create interest. Talk to them as if you were talking to a good friend. Show them who you are by the words you use and how you use them. Generic profiles generally get generic results - which is none. Create an interesting profile that makes a statement about you and you're more likely to meet a potential match. I mean it. You'll never find love online unless you take the plunge.

Social etiquette has changed a lot over the years, especially over the internet. It's perfectly acceptable for a girl to initiate conversation with a guy. Further, by relying on other people to start a conversation with you, you'll miss out on a lot of great opportunities. Take control, and don't be afraid to start a conversation. The occasional compliment is acceptable, but when it becomes constant, you'll only come across as needy. While you are interested in the person, and you do want to ask personal questions, shy away from drama that can ruin a good thing. This should be obvious, but if you're talking to several people at the same time, make sure you know who's who. There are thousands of people trying to date online just like you. They are all looking for love online. Even if you don't meet someone who you can romantically relate to within the first week, don't give up - keep trying.

Eventually, you'll meet someone who's a good match for you. What looks good on paper isn't always what works well in real life. You may meet someone online who seems to have everything you've ever wanted, but in real life, that person may turn out to be someone completely different. If you're not attracted to them in person, let them go. If you try to force things, you'll only drag out the inevitable. So you've been trying to meet someone online for months, but there's simply nobody that you're interested in. Give it time, or try another site. Don't settle on someone just to have someone to talk to. If you do talk to someone, let them know up front what your intentions are. Make sure that you are genuinely interested in the person before you make a romantic connection. To put it quite simply, there are no rules for meeting people online. Everyone is different and unique, and everyone has different ways of doing things. What can be interpreted one way can always be interpreted another by someone else. This list is meant to stimulate and encourage. Use this list as you may, but remember, it's up to you to take control of your life and make things happen. 1. Information cited from The National, an Abu Dhabi Media Company.2. Information cited from PsychCentral3. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.